Thanksgiving Pie

For my birthday, my brother- and sister-in-law got me a beautiful pie plate that I was able to use this Thanksgiving. It made my pie look so pretty!!  My mother-in-law also bought the three girls in the family (including herself) Thanksgiving pie cutters.  I used those to make a beautiful fall cover for my apple pie and also to "spice" up my pumpkin pies.

The only way to eat apple pie!!!

The perfect pumpkin pie companion!

My yummy apple pie - can't see the pie plate very well but the edges are the cool part!!

Pumpkin pie with turkey pie shapes

Adoption Application Finished!

We've done it!  It only took a month (plus) to complete, but it's done!  I put our finished adoption application in the mail this morning.  It felt like a huge task stuffing that envelope, sealing it up, and placing it in the mailbox.  We are just that much closer!  I of course had to take a picture of the finished application because I know I'm going to want to scrapbook all this sometime!
Next steps include our home study and making payments.

Application

Today Matt and I went to a meeting at CSS and we now are proud holders of an adoption application!  Lots of work to do now!  We will be working on this to try to finish as quickly as possible.  After we finish with the application, we will be assigned a home study writer and will get 3 visits which ironically will talk to us about our past, present, and future. Some very exciting things ahead!

Adoption Workshop

So this weekend we took our first big step in adoption.  We went to an adoption workshop in Anchorage all weekend.  We received TONS of information about adoptions.  I would say ALL our questions were answered along with questions we didn't even know we had.

Friday night we got to listen to a panel of adoptive parents, which was just wonderful.  We loved to hear each different story.  It really helped us to be even more excited about this important decision we made.  We also learned about things to do and not to do.  I think one of the most important things we were told during the panel was to remember that the adoption is such a small part of the process.  Parenting is what you will be doing from the day you get your child forward.

On Saturday we discussed transracial adoptions, adoption fees, legal issues, emotional issues, and we were also supposed to have an adoptee panel.  Our adoptee panel turned into one person who works for CSS, and was adopted back in '85.  She spoke about being left on the doorstep of a Korean orphanage and being raised in that orphanage until she was three until she was adopted by an American family in Michigan.  She was very positive and had a great personality.  I think she brought up a lot of issues that adoptees may go through throughout their lives.  Also good to know!  A lawyer came in to talk about the legal issues.  That part was a little boring (we had talked about most of it already).  Dang lawyers! ;)  The other thing we talked about was the adoption fees and I think we feel quite a bit better about that part of it all. One of the most important pieces from today was  Positive Adoption Language.  We never really thought about the language we use when talking about adoption, but this language makes sense.  Please click on the link above to take a look.  It is very important to us that all our friends and family begin to learn and use the same language.

Sunday we discussed birth families - who they are and what they go through in the adoption process.  We also talked more about the adoption process and what happens before, during, and after the baby is born.  Two birth mothers came in to share their stories which were just absolutely heart-wrenching and amazing.    I just could never imagine how a mother can make the decision to make an adoption plan for their child, but what a wonderful gift.  I just think how wonderful it would be to be lucky enough to be chosen to receive that gift.

So now we are done with that step.  We were told we had to wait a week or so before asking for an application. (Warning: venting about to take place)  UGH!!! Haven't we waited enough?!  We've been trying for nearly 7 years, waiting for our own.  We wait monthly for medication, blood tests, dr. appointments, cycles, etc.  We had to wait for this workshop. We'll be waiting for our home study, recommendation, portfolio, selection by a birthmother, relinquishment, and 6 month period until finalization.  Rrr! (Okay, venting done).

Sunday football food

Happy to have football on Sunday's again! Matt invited some people over and cooked up some delicious pulled pork, wings, bacon wrapped halibut, and jalapeño poppers. Matt received a jalapeño pepper rack from his brother and sister-in-law for his birthday. Worked nicely. The peppers were super hot though. I could only take one bite! Everything was super yummy!!

It's Fall in Alaska!

Seasons in Alaska hit fast! When fall comes it arrives with no or little warning. All the sudden, leaves are yellow/orange/red and falling on the ground. It becomes time to turn on the heater after being off since May. Darkness is returning and we can get to sleep without putting blankets on the windows.
Fall is my favorite season. I love wearing sweaters but not coats. I love smell of chimney smoke that returns with the cold. I get excited for soups!! I also love decorating my house with fall items. Hmmm! I should get my stuff out of the crawl space! I know what I'm doing this weekend!

Morning Moose

Baby moose

We were woken up early this morning by our lab/Shepard puppy and her barking. She usually sleeps in the living room, so I came out to quiet her down. In our backyard on the other side of the fence I saw a baby moose. Where there's a baby, there's always a mama. So I walked further into the living room and saw the mama... AND another baby. Matt and I sat and watched them for awhile eating our weeds in the back, hoping they wouldn't make it around to the front where the good stuff was (veggies and flowers). The babies eventually found Matt's sugar snap peas, though. It was fun to watch as the babies ventured off to the front yard and then across the street, while the mama stayed in the backyard. A neighbor dog started barking and those babies went speeding back to their mother and stuck close after that. I guess that's what they get for going off on their own! Haha! 

A little perspective to how close she is

The Help

So my favorite sister-in-law on Matt's side of the family suggested I read "The Help".  I picked it up at the Costco in Virginia and began reading it immediately.  Loved it!! Could hardly put it down.  I have since suggested it to many others, but haven't needed to since it is a bestseller.

Thank goodness I read it when I did since the movie just came out at the beginning of the month.  I went to watch it with a friend and her mom.  I felt the movie did the book great justice.  Only a few small details that were missing.  Nothing added or changed dramatically.  The actors were for the most part unknown (except for the main character and her mother).  It was a wonderful movie - funny, sad, and true to the story.  I highly recommend both the movie and book, but, of course, read the book first!! :)

Our Marathon Weekend

Me and Matt with our catch :)

So completely forgot to write about our crazy weekend last weekend!  Matt had rescheduled our halibut fishing trip for the first weekend after school started (not smart on his part!).  So Friday after school got out, I rushed home to get stuff ready.  Matt was already home early and had started to get stuff out to go.  We had to take the dogs to two different sitters and then stop in Anchorage for food and our bibs (for the race we were running Sunday).

We got into Homer around 11:30 and pulled into our camping spot.  We had already decided we would just camp out in our car.  That is something we'll never do again!  Very uncomfortable.  And Matt took all my space!  We woke up at 6 the next morning and showered.  Thank goodness our campground had showers! And they were free!!! Even better!

Matt hauling one in

Our boat left the dock at 7 and thankfully didn't have to turn around this time!! We fished all morning.  Found a great little "elementary" patch of fish.  I caught my two quickly and was done.  Matt decided he wanted to work more and kept throwing his back hoping for a bigger one - one that never came.  He eventually got his two and we were done.  Everyone on the boat caught their limit.  I didn't puke or feel sick (two other girls, however, weren't so lucky). So all in all it was a great success!

Matt in front of Bear Creek Winery

We got in from the ocean early and headed over to the Bear Creek Winery where we tasted some interesting, fruity wines.  I settled on a Peach Apricot.


We headed out of Homer at about 2:00 or 2:30.  We thought we would actually get home at a decent time, but there was more in store for us.  A few miles south of Girdwood, there was a head-on collision that closed the highway until 10 that night.  So we didn't get home until midnight.  The Seward Highway is one of the most dangerous highways in Alaska.  People are just not smart on that road.  Unfortunately, the driver of the car that was doing the right thing was the one that died that night.  So sad!

Us before the race

Well, so, we got home late and had to wake up early the next morning for our last race of the summer.  The Snow City 5k started at 930 on Sunday.  I was wiped out and did not do as well as I wanted.  I still beat my last years time by 6 seconds, though.  Still had a great time!!!

Isaac, firstmate, with one of Matt's chickens

Montana people with their catch

Our fearless, funny Captain

Firstmates filleting our fish as we head back to the dock 

Isaac, guy from MT, Matt, and lady from MT

School Started

Well, that time of the year is here!  School started last week.  I am teaching fourth grade this year.  So far I am loving it!! I have a wonderful class and they are making it so easy for me to teach them.  However, I have tons of work to do this year putting stuff together as nicely as it was for second grade.

I also am continuing my Master's degree.  I'm taking my time with it.  Just taking 2 classes a semester this year.  Next year I will do my principal internship.  For that I will have request a student teacher so that I can be out of the room as needed to fulfill my time obligations.  I don't plan on being a principal for a while, but it will be nice to have the schooling done and out of the way.

Yummy Dinner!

We finally had a nice day after two weeks of wind and rain.  Matt made one of my favorite salmon recipes, but this time on a cedar plank on the barbecue.  It is a salmon stuffed with a mixture of pesto, pine nuts, spinach, and sun-dried tomatoes. On the side he made basil pearl couscous. 
For dessert.... homemade, warm banana bread, made by Lindsay, of course! YUMMY!

Triathlete and Me

This past Saturday, Matt and I participated in the Why Not Tri triathlon in Wasilla.  Since Matt is such a stud, he did the whole thing by himself.  I participated with a team.  I did the running portion.  A good friend of mine, Alicia Johnson, did the biking.  A good friend of hers did the swimming.   Surprisingly enough, as a team we beat Matt only by 2 minutes... not sure how that happened.


Matt did very well for not training this year.  He was slower only by 6 minutes from last year. Last year he trained and last year they did not time transitions.  Matt will need to work on those transitions for next year!  I'm almost thinking about doing the whole thing myself next year.  We'll see how much training I get done this winter!

Our First Step

Well, we took our first step in the adoption process.  We signed up for an adoption workshop in September through Catholic Social Services.  For those that know what we've been through, it's been a very emotional and difficult journey trying to have our own child.  We continue that journey with the help of a wonderful doctor, Dr. Stigen, in California.  She has been the best doctor we've had through this 6 year ordeal.  She is just amazing and at least I am feeling and "working" more like I'm suppose to! If you know ANYONE that is having trouble getting pregnant please tell them about NaProTechnology (http://www.naprotechnology.com) and the Pope Paul VI Institute (http://www.popepaulvi.com).  It has been a Godsend for us!
When I first signed up to do a blog several years ago, it was going to be to talk about everything we have gone and will go through to try to have our own baby.  It's so hard to try to find out what to say and how to say it without feeling like you're asking people to feel sorry for you.  But things have changed a little.  While the process still continues to be heart-wrenching and depressing at times, I believe we have more optimism about it now than we ever have.
I hit 30 this year and just can't wait any longer, though.  So we are taking the steps toward adoption.  If we end up getting pregnant, too, well then, all the better!!  I am excited about this step in our lives, but nervous as well.  I hope that it does not take long, but then again, we've become experts at waiting.  I just pray to God that everything works out in the end and we end up with the baby we've always wanted.
As most of you know, adoption can be expensive and any help we can get is always appreciated.  You are more than welcome to donate to our adoption fund which you can do right from this blog. Just look on the right hand side to find the donate button.
It feels really good to get this out there, to write about it, to have people read it, and know maybe just a small inkling of what Matt and I have been quietly dealing with for several years.  Kind of like confession! :)  So we will continue to do what we have to to finally be parents.  Here is a little poem that I found that about tells it all about the way I feel.
God Bless!!

Thoughts on Becoming a Mother

There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss and though they are good mothers and love their children, I know that I will be better. 

I will be better not because of genetics, or money or that I have read more books but because I have struggled and toiled for this child. 
I have longed and waited. 
I have cried and prayed. 
I have endured and planned over and over again. 

Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams. 
I will notice everything about my child. 
I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover. I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life. 

I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dream. My dream will be crying for me. 

I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child that my friends will not see. 

Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to, I will not be careless with my love. 

I will be a better mother for all that I have endured. I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend and sister because I have known pain. 

I know disillusionment as I have been betrayed by my own body. I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall. 

I have prevailed. 
I have succeeded. 
I have won. 

So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort. I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs. 

I listen. 

And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely. I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard. I have learned a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes. 

I have learned to appreciate life. 

Yes I will be a wonderful mother.

~Author Unknown

I Love My Gardens!

These just started blooming today!

I would not say that gardening is my favorite thing to do, but I love the rewards that have come from it.  I have done a flower garden in the front of the house since the first spring we've lived here.  I've decided that getting perennials are the best way to go.  That way I know what I've planted and what should come up next year.  I do have a little area set aside specifically for annuals like daisies, but perennials are my favorite. My rose bush is my absolute favorite.  This is my 3rd one in three years because I guess I need to winterize it... I really love the colors in my garden though.  Makes me smile!

This year I also added another little piece of landscaping to our yard - way up front near the road.  This one will be a work in progress as I have to weed it constantly and there is more that I want to do with it, but it's too late in the growing season.

Matt has a little vegetable garden which has not done too well the past couple years.  We do have chives and snap peas though!  Also planted in our yard is some yummy raspberries.  This is the first year we have had any, but there are not very many (maybe 4 berries).  This is a picture of one... right before I ate it!